Yurt Trip

For the past 2 days I have been gone on an experiential experience at a yurt tent in the high Uintahs. It was a growing and tiring experience – one that I will never forget. I really enjoyed the beautiful scenery in the mountains with the snow and trees all around.
To get there we drove for about an hour and a half. We parked on the side of the road and snow shoed with backpacks and sleds of gear into the campsite. It was about an 1 ½ hike. A hurt is a dome tent with a fire stove to heat it a little warmer than the outside air. I kept warm until halfway through the night, then it got to be a chilly experience. Oh well, all part of the fun.
Last night we went on a little night we went on a little night hike. At one point we had a little snowball fight in a snow covered meadow. Shae, the recreation therapist intern, tried to tackle me a few times. I felt like a little kid again playing and laughing in the snow. To me it was a symbol of recovery because in my eating disorder I wouldn’t have the strength, energy, or attitude to engage in a childish activity.
I enjoyed the trip and being in the mountains, but I was ready for a shower when we got back to the Center for Change. It was especially nice to warm up in the warm shower. I felt really dirty and stinky. I think I added a new smell to the CFC family room for a while.
Yesterday, I taught the 12-step group to the inpatient unit for Dr. Julie. She asked me to do it a few weeks ago as a requirement for my next phase. I was really nervous to do it to some people I know so little about since these patients have come in since I have come over to RTC. I prayed for peace and comfort to be able to teach with the spirit. I really felt it helped a lot. I know I learned a lot from the lesson even if no one else did.
My lesson was on step 2 which is focused on finding a higher power to receive strength to overcome the challenges in life. To introduce the lesson I invited the group to draw a picture with their eyes closed. This represented how lost and dark life may seem without a higher power to guide or direct you. I explained how a higher power can bring light and guidance in how to overcome. Even with the lights on the drawing will not be completely perfect. Mistakes will occur, but will be important to the overall picture. Sometimes even the mistakes can be transformed or seen as the best parts of the final picture.
I then explained how a higher power can also be found in friends, family, and your treatment team. I did a little object lesson with the girls where I had one person stand in front of 3 other girls with balls in their hands. On the count of 3 the 3 girls were to throw their balls at the girl in the middle. Her job was to try to catch as many balls as she could. As you can guess, she wasn’t able to catch any of the balls. I related this to how sometimes I feel I need to overcome everything myself without any help from others. I then asked the girl in the middle to make a plan to be more successful. She invited 2 more people to help her catch the balls and instructed the ball throwers when and where to throw. With this plan, all the balls were successfully caught. This symbolized the power found in reaching out to receive help from others to overcome a challenge in life. I expressed my gratitude for the people I have on my team to help me battle my eating disorder. This includes my husband, family, friends, treatment team, and my loved ones. I am so grateful for the experiences and people I have met at the CFC. Many of them have helped me grow in change in many ways that cannot and will not be forgotten. They are angels of my soul.
To finish the lesson I read the story, “I’ll be with You Always.” It is about a boy who wants to become a famous artist like his father. When he was a young boy he would sit on father’s lap and feel the strokes of his painting. As he got older he went to art school in Europe and started to become famous. His father warned him to remember to see to be his best and not let fame and fortune distract him. However, fame and fortune began to do this, so his father sent for him to come home. He hurried home for fear his father was dying. He cried in agony to his father of his failure. However, the boy’s father asked him to come and paint with him. He put his hands over his fathers and painted the most beautiful thing. As he finished he told his father to look how beautiful it was. He father explained how he was now blind and that the boy had painted it. The father explained that he just needed to remember that no matter what he would always be with him to help him.
I related how this story reminded me that I am the painter of my life, but I am not alone. My higher powers are there to help guide my brush and enlighten my way. With their strength and power I feel I am able to overcome all things. I know my picture will not be perfect, but the mistakes will add to its beauty and power. I also know my maker is aware of what the final picture will turn out to be. He will guide my hand to complete in a way that is perfect in its own light. I am so grateful for my higher powers and the enlightening strength they give me to paint my picture.