Reaching for Recovery

The goal seems so close, yet so far away

Yet my feet stumble, my soul weary to the demon’s taunts

He whispers constantly of failure and hopelessness

At times his fears envelope me

Hoping and reaching forward to my anchor of light

Only to be captured by the demon’s grasp with my imperfect steps

His dark perspective blinds me of my potential’s path

Reaching to my Savior to escape his shadowy abyss

I plead fervently for my Savior's grace and mercies

Help me unravel his binding cords of destruction

Rescue me with heaven’s hope and love

Keep me in the safety of thy arms

Lead my steps through this raging storm

Keep my soul anchored in faith and hope

Prove the possibility of fighting diligently

Carry me, Hold me, Walk with me

Take me home to the safe haven of thy eternal love

The Lost Boys

In the recovery process, J. M. Barrie's story Peter Pan has been a source to compare the process and magic of change and growth. Dr. Julie and I often refer to the magical pixie dust of life found in love, passion, and experience. A while back, I found a glow wand with a butterfly on it. We haven't cracked it light yet because Dr. Julie is waiting for a recovery milestone. Yet often, my "Tinker Bell" waves her magical wand as we discuss experiences. Her glowing love has and is truly magical!

During my session this past week, a new comparison was made that was strengthening and uplifting. The battle for recovery at times is overwhelming and hard, as any challenge in life. Often, I wish magic pixie dust would sprinkle Ed all away at once. Whoosh! One swoop of the wand, and it would disappear. However, I am discovering pixie dust is powerful, but through tiny sparkles of change and growth. Great power is found in catching and expanding the smallest twinkles of light.

A new Peter Pan connection was made with that of the "Lost Boys." In the story they are minor characters of great importance. Without their help, Peter Pan would not have the strength to fight and hope in the promise of youth. Each of the boys emulates the hope of Neverland, a place of youthful adventures. This hope is what drives Peter's ability to fly. Before the magic of the pixie dust can work, Peter and others have to think of a "happy thought."

Valiant and courageous, the "Lost Boys" fight Captain Hook and the pirates to keep Neverland a place of passion, play, and pleasure. Their heroic actions keeps and enlightens the power of pixie dust. The "Lost Boys" symbolize the hope that ignites with actions of faith in the future.

My Redeemer's Hands and Feet

This morning my heart was touched by the things I studied and read in the scriptures & "Ensign". I know the promises of strength from scriptures are true.

I am reading one of my favorite parts of the scriptures, 3 Nephi 11, when Christ appears to the Nephites. I have read these scriptures often, but was touched in a new word by such a simple word - "feet."

3 Nephi 11:14-15 reads:

14 Arise and come forth unto me, that ye may ^athrust your hands into my side, and also that ye may ^bfeel the prints of the nails in my hands and in my feet, that ye may know that I am the^cGod of Israel, and the God of the whole ^dearth, and have been slain for the sins of the world.

15 And it came to pass that the multitude went forth, and thrust their hands into his side, and ^adid feel the prints of the nails in his hands and in his feet; and this they did do, going forth one by one until they had all gone forth, and did see with their eyes and did feel with their hands, and did know of a surety and did bear record, that it was he, of whom it was written by the prophets, that should come.

The Lord invites the multitude to come unto Him to touch His hands and feet. It was touching to read His beckoning to touch His hands and feet. Both mark His eternal love for us. His hands emulate His love, peace and comfort He wraps around us in times of sorrow, pain or grief. Christ's feet mark His willingness to walk with us through our journey, even to carry us when it gets to hard.

Reading about the prints in His hands and feet, helped me remember the story of the woman who bathed Christ's feet with her tears and ointment. The story is found in Luke 7:36--40. Hearing that christ was coming to the city, the woman sinner desired to come unto Him to be healed.

Luke 7:38 reads,

38 And stood at his feet behind him weeping, and began to wash his feet with tears, and did wipe them with the hairs of her head, and kissed his feet, and ^aanointed them with the ointment.

The Lord goes on to teach the disciples His love for those who sin and repent. Luke 7:47, reads,

"47 Wherefore I say unto thee, Her sins, which are many, are ^aforgiven; for she loved much: but to whom little is forgiven, the same loveth little.

48 And he said unto her, Thy sins are ^aforgiven.

49 And they that sat at meat with him began to say within themselves, Who is this that ^aforgiveth sins also?

50 And he said to the woman, Thy ^afaith hath saved thee; go in ^bpeace."

Adversity truly brings great blessings of learning about God's eternal and all encompassing love for all men. I like how this woman bathes His feet with her tears. To me this symbolizes Christ's understanding for all we are blessed to endure. In all we are called to endure, Christ is there walking and even carrying us to return to the safety of heaven. I am so grateful for my Savior's strengthening power as He walks with me through my storms, sunrises, and sunsets. I hope to be able to bow down at His feet some day and bathe them with my tears of love and joy for all He has blessed me with.