Life Quest Day #1

February 1, 2010

I began a 3 day workshop called “Life Quest” today. It is about letting go of and remembering the past, living in the present, and planning for the future. For the first part of the workshop we thought about past memories who define who we are. Some of the things that I thought about were my wedding day, working with my grandpa, graduating from BYU, playing sports, and working at Butterfield Canyon Elementary. These are some big experiences that have shaped my character to who I am today. As we discussed high and low memories I realized how important they all are to my life. Life is like a mountain, you need to experience the lows to better appreciate and understand the highs.
This afternoon we talked about the present. They showed a clip from The Lord of the Ring. The hobbit has the ring and is struggling to give it to Gandolfo. They related this to the power of the eating disorder. Like the ring, Ed is hard to let go of – an evil power. However, it is an important power to live freely. I am striving to release it fully and find out who I am.
In one of the activities I realized something I need to learn and accept. I so much want to love others; however, I feel I am not loveable. I realized today that in order to truly love, I need to believe and know I am loveable. By receiving love, I can know How to love in return. This is a goal I am reaching for beginning with my Savior and family.
In another activity we talked about passions and dreams we had for the future. My eating disorder has taken away the things I used to love and enjoy. During the activity we were asked to write down the passions we know we have. I know I am passionate about my family, the gospel, teaching and learning. Some things I am interested in becoming passionate about is home décor, card making, running, reading, music, plays, gardening, traveling, playing guitar, food storage, flower arranging, and writing. I know with time I can discover these passions and they will help me discover myself. I also learned that passions can change with time as I grow, change and explore.