Shadows

The other day while on a walk, I noticed my shadow. With my love of the Peter Pan allegory, I began to think of the symbol of Peter's shadow. It seems Peter Pan is only afraid of one thing - not pirates, crocodiles, or heights- just his very own shadow.

I think this is symbolic of his fear of the unknown ahead- for change. He tries to "tuck" it way, hide it away. Yet it is always there, stitched on his shoes or in his pocket. Like Peter, my shadow is always there. However, its position changes depending on the direction of the sun.

As I looked at my shadow, I connected it to my road of recovery. Sometimes I feel my shadow is in front of me with looming fears of the future - the unknown. Anxiety to make the wrong and first step forward keep me from moving until my courage and faith in God builds.

One of my favorite quotes of faith is from President Packer, "Faith, to be faith, must center around something that is not known. Faith, to be faith, must go beyond that for which there is confirming evidence. Faith, to be faith, must go into the unknown. Faith, to be faith, must walk to the edge of the light, and then a few steps into the darkness."

At midday my shadow stands beside me. To me this is symbolic of the present. My worries of the here and now fill my mind. At times it feels I am in a race with Ed, competing to see who will overcome. There is a secret I have in my pocket Ed doesn't know about - pixie dust! These sprinkles of light glow with encouragement from Julie, Torey, and my family. Most of all, my inner light and knowledge of God's eternal love keeps me focused on my dreams, goals, and passions.

With the rise of the sun, my shadow follows behind me. To me this represents my regrets of the past. My negative mind swarms with would, could and should haves. Yet, it is hard to move forward when you are looking back instead of forward. When looking behind, my feet more easily stumble and fall. However, when I focus my eyes forward to the light of the new day, I am empowered with God's light. He is my strength and beacon to overcome all.

Like Peter, I know my "shadow" is always there - behind, in front, or beside me. With this understanding, I have the power to stitch or unstitch its influence to lead me to greater possibilities and potential.